The one thing that has been churning in my brain as I reflect on these changes and is something I suspect happens with a lot of teachers: the want, no more like the need, to be better.
This can manifest in a lot of different ways. It can show up as a Green Eyed Troll (GET), coveting what others have and tearing them down with snarky remarks or quick judgements; it can turn into a pity party that is demoralizing and often debilitating; or it can morph into something positive. I am not going to claim that I haven't looked at what other teachers are doing and have that nagging voice from the corner of my mind telling me that I should have thought of that first - or worse - they did that so much better than I did. It happens. I give myself a second to dwell, take a deep breath, and then push forward. Wasting time worrying about what other teachers are teaching in their classroom does not make me a better teacher in my own classroom.
It can be easy to forget that this is not a competition of what classroom is the best or which teacher has it right (because there is no such thing). We are all working towards the goal of learning for our students and I would guess most every teacher out there is trying different methods to reach their learners and propel them towards success. Some things work, others don't, and a lot of it can be in flux depending on the climate of the classroom and make-up of the learners. To be jealous of that, or make yourself sick thinking you are not doing enough is counterproductive and will not get you or your students where you need to go.
I am excited that I work in a profession where I am learning things all of the time. I am motivated by those who push my thinking and inspire me to try new methods and reach all of my students. I feel so proud of the recent accomplishments my students have made and continue to make.
But even with all of that, I know I am not done being better than myself.